Chaotic Resolve
by A Glimpse of Ethereal Blue
Summary: Death is not the worst thing you can get. Beyond life, there is a place where you can linger, along with the living, walking this Earth. Everything remains the same, except for yourself, forever changed, hurt and marked. This is a VincentxOC. [CoverArt:AndreiaFerreira] -ON HIATUS-
1. Chapter 1

_**Chaos & Entropy **_

_**Death is not the worst thing you can get. Beyond life, there is a place where you can linger, along with the living, walking this Earth. Everything remains the same, except for yourself, forever changed, hurt and marked. There is nothing left but a void, burning inside, teasing you, inciting your darkest pretensions.**_

**Author's Note**:

There goes an explanation of the plot, characters and the point from where the action will begin. Vincent is (also) one of my favorite FF7 characters and, one of these days my mind did come up with something and of course, after that… you have to let it flow.

**Plot**: this story takes place right after Vincent Valentine (in his Turk form) gets shot. As you all know, Hojo is the main responsible for it and Lucrecia freaks out with the situation. Her resolve leads to Vincent's salvation and "transformation" into the Vincent we all know: the Chaos-driven man with serious issues and tendency for isolation and abandonment, given the complexity involved with dealing with his own demons (never better said). Well, but all this isn't new. My story starts with Vincent first waking up to a world where Lucrecia does not exist anymore, since she left and chose to remain forever in stasis, in the bottom of that cave. (There will be references to DoC and AC. Time line is not relevant.)

However Lucrecia did think about everything. She saved Vincent and she tried to make it secret from curious eyes but… real life isn't that simple. Lucrecia's assistant, Laura, is a young scientist who is starting now to study the power and effects of Mako energy in humans. One day, Laura finds in her desk a file – VV's file – left to her by Lucrecia, who abandoned the project and disappeared, leaving young Laura with a very particular test subject, about to rise.

Hojo does not know of Lucrecia's intentions and all the situation is kept secret from him (in theory). It will only depend on Laura to find a way of easing Vincent's mind and, bit by bit, telling him the truth – of recent and former happenings. It won't be an easy task.

**Characters**: Vincent (of course), Lucrecia, Hojo, Laura (my OC), Shinra labs crew – for now. As the story develops, the usual characters will appear (Yuffie, Cid, Barret, Tifa, etc.) No Sephiroth involved, at least for now; I have no intentions of introducing the one-winged-angel in this fic.

**Comments/Spoilers**:

Things will get messy, that is certain. Laura is young and she has serious difficulty handling with the recent experiment. Vincent's unpredictability and constant questions make her feel extremely _not_ at ease.

Vincent refuses to believe his surroundings. He is attached – terribly – to Lucrecia and he does not want to give up on her. He wants to find her and talk to her, not satisfied with the explanations provided by the young scientist who visits him daily.

Hojo – despite working in another division – does not get easily convinced. He suspects something is not quite right and the nervousness of Lucrecia's protégé makes him wonder what is she hiding from everybody else at the company. Eventually, he will have to investigate.

And, finally, the rating - M. Yes, things will (also) get interesting. I mean, Vincent is an adorable man and extremely easy to the eye. Our young scientist – Laura - is young and lonely, and she finds herself falling for Vincent as time progresses. However, Vincent's heart is hurt and still longs for Lucrecia. For him, hope is the last thing to lose.

So, for those who enjoy VincentXOC pairings, this is one of those stories. The fluffy thing will take place only in later chapters but I can only promise you it will be worthy of reading. :)

I will be posting this rather slowly because – for those who do not know – I am currently writing another fic [Dreamcatcher]. (Check it out in my profile, it's there for those who may be interested. It's SephirothxOC.)

So… that's it. I can only hope this teaser-like suggestion may have caught your eye. I accept comments, suggestions, anything. Feel free to review and say whatever you want about the story. Thank you very much in advance.

_Soon… the __**Prologue**__…_


	2. Prologue Lucrecia Crescent softens

**A/N - And there we go. There are references (somehow distorted but the timeline here isn't exactly the same) to DoC and to Vincent' past story in here. I hope you like it.**

**My sincere thanks to **_**Ikuni Hattori**_** for her sweet review and to **_**DevilAngelResa18**_ **for her interest in the story. Let's see if the prologue meets your expectations :) :D**

**Prologue**.

My watery eyes almost betrayed me.

Closing the lab armored door with the multiple keys and electronic access, I had no choice but to leave this place… for good.

I couldn't stand this anymore. Seeing Vincent like this, changing so many times a day, suffering inside that experimental tank, pain imbibed in his groans, each time I infused him with the materia. His monstrous transformation was difficult to control, weeks from here; but now, the protomateria seemed to provide him a sort of self-control and he was now… soothing. Or so, I hoped.

Hiding Vincent from Dr. Hojo was the most difficult part. Apart from all the experimentations he had performed with Vincent's body, I could trick him into the lie I had wasted his body along with more experimentations and that, in consequence, Vincent's body died. God knows the evidence I had to made up to convince him that Vincent was no more.

However my nervousness around him did give my secrecy away. He felt I was hiding something from him. After all, we were involved. I had had a son with him. A son I was categorically forbidden to see… because he didn't let me. I wondered what he was doing with our baby. Each time I thought about it, a lump in my throat prevented me to speak, to think coherently. I tried so many times asking him… even beg him to let me see my baby. But he never acquiesced to my request, justifying his attitudes with legal aspects and blunt prohibitions.

Vincent's stabilization was consuming my time in a way I couldn't manage anymore. I had done everything I could to save him. He would live. How, I didn't know, but he would live… to tell his story.

His survival didn't depend on me… not anymore. Now with Dr. Hojo convinced of his disappearing and merging with Lifestream, he had a chance of escaping. But I couldn't do anything more. I couldn't stay. I couldn't even look at him, and see in his eyes the familiarity of Grimoire, calling my name… reviving the moment my greed conduced to his death. It was my fault. It was all of my making.

_Shame on you, Lucrecia Crescent_.

Vincent's face…his stare, his ways, his… voice… reminded me so much of his father… and the thought of him was… unbearable. My guilt weighted too much. My insatiable hunger of knowing, of experimenting, of discovering something new about Chaos… was my mistake.

A mistake that took Grimoire's life and, in turn, allowed me to save his own son.

_Vincent, I am so sorry. For everything_.

I was sorry, really.

I was sorry for taking the life of his father and never said a word about what really happened, the day Grimoire joined the Lifestream.

I was sorry for not being able to tell him how well I thought of him, and how things between us could never progress.

I was sorry I broke his heart when I was confronted with the decision of staying with the Dr, and not him. I couldn't look at him without feeling guilty. The death of his father stood between us, like an impenetrable barrier, not allowing me to… fall for him.

He was a beautiful man, with a strong personality and a rather tender side, discreetly exposed when he smiled, when he stared at me, even when I wasn't looking back. I could never reciprocate his affection for me. My conscience didn't let me.

And I saw how my apparent disinterest hurt him. I felt the disappointment in his sincere, warm stare.

Wiping my tears away, I let myself ease out of the abandoned area I was in. Shinra's labs held several buildings. This place, where I was hiding Vincent for a month now, used to be one for animal experimentation only. It was a discreet place, half-stuck underground, and it had everything, just like the lab I worked at, with Dr. Hojo. Power, water, all the technology available, including living quarters. It used to be an old place where scientists lived and worked until a _biohazard_ accident occurred ten years ago and the place was formally shut down, after the whole staff and test subjects died due to such occurrence.

With Vincent's file in my arms, I headed not into my lab, but into my student's shared lab, where she had desk, her files, the reports of her research – the research I was conducting too, since I was her tutor.

I couldn't tutor her anymore, nor sharing with her my little secret. The only thing I could do was… leaving her with Vincent's recovery. She would have to deal with it, since I had no strength to go on, anymore. It was consuming me… it was killing me.

I had decided to leave. Leave Hojo, leave this life. I couldn't stand my existence anymore.

_I am sorry, Vincent. I am so sorry_…

My mind wandered, apologizing to the one whose body remained in a still slumber… but about to awake.

Reaching the organized desk of my pupil, Laura, I left it there, strategically placed, Vincent's file. She would do things exactly as I had indicated there. I had every possibility covered, each one with a feasible solution to it. Laura wasn't stupid, or dumb. Her intelligence would lead her to Vincent and, once there, I had no doubt she would be able to handle it… him.

My indications were simple, easy. There was no chance to miss. Vincent will awake, rise to this world again, successfully.

The only difference is that I won't be in it, anymore. At least, not in my actual form.

Leaving my pupil's desk, I headed now to Dr. Hojo lab. He was still there – as usual. For him, the only thing that mattered was his work. Not me, not our son, but his work.

Soon I would be free of him, as well.

Soon, I would slumber in a quiet place, where no memories, no guilt, no real world would reach me.

_Good bye, Vincent_.

**So, what do you think? Lucrecia is saying her goodbyes and… what will happen now? I'll see you next chapter!**

**Oh and… review, please :) if you don't mind. I'd love to know your opinion.**


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